figlia_morbida | Ryslig

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WELCOME TO YOUR PRIVATE CHANNEL, TRISH UNA. FOR SECURE COMMUNICATION, USE 867.53.099.99 * Zigazigah has joined 867.53.099.99 <Zigazigah> Don't talk to me. <Zigazigah>** Thanks.

Main Username: < Zigazigah >

Public Appearance UN: < Western_Horizon >

Anon: < sharpdistance > , < kidcharlemagne > (not actually anon now because of Hinata)

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I'll forgive your first joke, but only because I don't understand it even remotely.

[Daily reminder you're in deep with Italians, Steve.]

I'll forgive your second too, but only because it was cute. And I'm only giving you that because you're doing your very best to be sweet.

You don't have to do that though. If there's a solution, it's on me to find it.

[ Listen, it was worth a shot. Who's to say Italy doesn't have their own version of Smokey called Baked Ziti or something? ]

we have this bear that's like the mascot for campfire safety, and he shows up to tell you all the different ways you can fuck it up
not LITERALLY, i mean that's how the commercials go

[ And ok, ok, this is where he's not going to get all caught up in the fact that she called him sweet. ]

it's not, though
sticking together, helping each other out is the best thing we can do here

Steve. Did you really think I was going to take that literally?

[Listen, she knows he's talking to the closest thing anyone can get to a sapient bear, but, sir.

Please.

Her mood is crap, but there's the tiniest bright spot in Steve explaining a shitty American forest mascot to her, however.]

I don't disagree with that necessarily either, but there are other things you help me with already. I suppose you could call it "leaving bear problems to bears".

you guys treat america like it's the moon , why wouldn't i think you were going to take that literally?

[ Interesting, interesting. ]

hmmmmm
what is it i'm helping you with already?

[ That he's viewed as a help at all is news to him. ]

I'm sure if I came at you with every distinctly Italian experience I could think of, you'd feel the same. From what I've seen of America in movies, your culture and architecture are both wildly different.

We may as well live on different planets.

[The moon comparison is too small in scope. Think bigger, Steve!]

Don't think too hard on it, by the way. It'll be less effective if you do.

[This is an insanely oblique way of saying Steve helps just by being Steve. He wouldn't be down to talk to her about dumb shit when she's clearly feeling less than great, right? This is a Steve-ism.]

yeah, our towers are straight

:P

ok, ok
hope it keeps working for you then, whatever it is i'm doing

Sure, and our Leaning Tower has been able to survive earthquakes since it's construction in the eleventh century. What may tilt isn't destined to fall.

[People out here defending the Leaning Tower's honor: Trish.]

Genuinely, if you're confused I would tell you, but I get the sense you know exactly what I mean.

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Ryslig | IC inbox

<Zigazigah> OPBEARTUNITIES

<Harrington> her options are looking grizzly

<Zigazigah> puts you in the pear wiggler for this pun assault

<Harrington> bear wiggler BEAR WIGGLER [ i am instantly decapitated by bear claws ]

<Zigazigah> puts the rest of u in the bear wiggler to make a smoothie

<Harrington>

<Zigazigah>