[Everything she's said has been an attempt at redirection. Away from him, and towards herself. Exactly because of how he's reacting now, and like always, it seems impossible to do that with Giorno.
He's like her, in that regard.
But she's not thinking about that, not anymore, not when she feels her own humming anger climb up her throat in a snarl that reverberates through her chest as she leans forward, hissing through her teeth:]
What the hell are you talking about? I haven't thought of you that way in months. I know you mean that invincible, untouchable boy I knew nothing about.
[If he comes back, then I'll be alright.
She remembers the bout they had in the wake of Fabius Bile. She remembers how much he emphasized he wasn't okay in that moment. Haruno, then, only proved he never was.]
If I did, Giorno, we wouldn't be talking right now.
[Because she wouldn't know to worry. Because he let her in. And he tried to change his behavior, which she appreciates, but it doesn't eliminate the core issue.
But it relieved it, because that's what compromise is, right? Both parties gain something, and give up something in return.]
You cannot in any reasonable capacity expect to show me the person behind this dream, and not have me grapple with the reality of it. No fucking reasonable person would take it at face value.
So I emphasize once again, my response had nothing to do with you. Not a damn thing! It's because this world and the one we left behind are so ugly that I feel this way, but you know what?
I don't have to like every part of who you are and what you're doing and still care about you as a person. Being honest with me doesn't mean I'll be happy regardless of the circumstances. I can support you, I can feel responsible for your connection to me, I can disagree with you – all at the same time – and it's not a wholesale indictment of you in any capacity. If you take having an opinion on my place in your world as total rejection, then I can do nothing to change your mind.
But I have to impress upon you that it's because I know you that you cannot treat us like we're all the same. If that's how you think, it's no wonder my reaction seemed wrong to you. But it's how I feel, and I'm being honest too. However, you don't have to like how I feel either. That's your right.
[Bruno said similar. What he did on her behalf once upon a time wasn't about her. And that was easier to swallow then, because they were strangers. But once again, things have changed. And it nearly drives her mad, that while things like this are different, others stay the same. It's no wonder they're falling apart. Or maybe it's just her tenuous bond with them that's falling apart.
If honesty was all it took, they wouldn't be having this problem right? But something is broken, all of this is crumbling to pieces in her hands, and she un-cups her palms and lets them fall. Against everything she wanted from this, she lets her emotions take the reins.]
If that means I'll hurt you no matter what I say or do, then maybe you should go.
hear it hurgling
He's like her, in that regard.
But she's not thinking about that, not anymore, not when she feels her own humming anger climb up her throat in a snarl that reverberates through her chest as she leans forward, hissing through her teeth:]
What the hell are you talking about? I haven't thought of you that way in months. I know you mean that invincible, untouchable boy I knew nothing about.
[If he comes back, then I'll be alright.
She remembers the bout they had in the wake of Fabius Bile. She remembers how much he emphasized he wasn't okay in that moment. Haruno, then, only proved he never was.]
If I did, Giorno, we wouldn't be talking right now.
[Because she wouldn't know to worry. Because he let her in. And he tried to change his behavior, which she appreciates, but it doesn't eliminate the core issue.
But it relieved it, because that's what compromise is, right? Both parties gain something, and give up something in return.]
You cannot in any reasonable capacity expect to show me the person behind this dream, and not have me grapple with the reality of it. No fucking reasonable person would take it at face value.
So I emphasize once again, my response had nothing to do with you. Not a damn thing! It's because this world and the one we left behind are so ugly that I feel this way, but you know what?
I don't have to like every part of who you are and what you're doing and still care about you as a person. Being honest with me doesn't mean I'll be happy regardless of the circumstances. I can support you, I can feel responsible for your connection to me, I can disagree with you – all at the same time – and it's not a wholesale indictment of you in any capacity. If you take having an opinion on my place in your world as total rejection, then I can do nothing to change your mind.
But I have to impress upon you that it's because I know you that you cannot treat us like we're all the same. If that's how you think, it's no wonder my reaction seemed wrong to you. But it's how I feel, and I'm being honest too. However, you don't have to like how I feel either. That's your right.
[Bruno said similar. What he did on her behalf once upon a time wasn't about her. And that was easier to swallow then, because they were strangers. But once again, things have changed. And it nearly drives her mad, that while things like this are different, others stay the same. It's no wonder they're falling apart. Or maybe it's just her tenuous bond with them that's falling apart.
If honesty was all it took, they wouldn't be having this problem right? But something is broken, all of this is crumbling to pieces in her hands, and she un-cups her palms and lets them fall. Against everything she wanted from this, she lets her emotions take the reins.]
If that means I'll hurt you no matter what I say or do, then maybe you should go.